Arrrrrrrgh...

Let me tell you what kind of sleeper I am. I require complete darkness. I not only turn my alarm clock away from my face, I also cover it up.

Joe got a new alarm clock for his side of the room. He wanted to be able to easily see the time. What does this new clock do? At the touch of a button, it hideously projects the time on the ceiling in bright red, so we can see it ticking away all night.

What's worse, much worse, is that it looks like this:


Need I even assure you that our bedroom does not have a dead pirate theme? I prefer our bedroom to be a peaceful retreat, not a place of impending mutiny.

I must also divulge that this wasn't a whim purchase. It wasn't a purchase at all. Joe saved cereal boxes for months, and eventually saved enough to mail away for this treasure.

Now let me tell you about our little neighbor boy. He has spent the entire summer running around in nothing but underpants, a cape, pirate hat, eye patch and sword.

I decided to be tight-lipped about Joe's acquisition. Joe, on his own, came to the conclusion that, perhaps, this clock would be better off next door. I, of course, fully supported his decision.

A blink and a smile

Joe has been out of town for the past few days and Jia and I haven't been sleeping much. So, when, three days ago, she started looking at me, blinking and then smiling, I thought she had developed an eye twitch from being so tired.

But day after day, it kept happening.

Today, I worried that maybe she wasn't getting enough of some vitamin, which had resulted in a facial tic.

Then tonight, during cuddle time, she did it again. A blink and a starry-eyed smile. I said, "Why are you blinking?" She giggled and said, "Grandpa does that."

I just called Grandpa and apparently he has been covertly teaching her how to wink! (But, obviously, she hasn't mastered it yet.) A blink and a smile. Now, of course, I think it's pretty darn cute.

Zhongqiu Jie

Although the moon is still a no-show due to poor weather, we enjoyed the mooncakes! My friend Binh said they're similar to fruitcake, given to someone and then the recipient says, "uh, thanks." But we liked them and will purchase them every year. Jia did spit out the duck egg yolk, but ate the rest of her wedge and asked for more.

The legend about the mooncakes is as follows: About 700 years ago, the Mongols controlled China. The Chinese wanted to rule their own country, so they plotted a revolt. Bakers hid the battle plans inside tiny mooncakes, knowing the Mongols wouldn't eat them. The mooncakes were then given to the people with instructions that they should eat them on the 15th day of the eight lunar month. On that day (today), the people cracked open their cakes, read the plans, and overthrew the Mongol government.

Part of a Chinese poem explains another important aspect of the day: "Loved ones are remembered this day, for we watch the same moon in the sky." I imagine Jia's birthparents are especially thinking of her today.

Moon Festivities

This Tuesday, we will celebrate the Harvest Moon Festival. We purchased lotus seed paste and red bean mooncakes from a local Chinese-run bakery. The pastries have an egg yolk inside, which represents the moon. We plan to lay outside on a blanket and gaze at the bright moon while drinking hot tea and eating mooncakes.


This holiday is right up Jia's alley as she is all about the moon - and eating! The bakers gave her a cookie too so we're off to a good start!

Is anyone else celebrating? What are you doing for it? I'd love ideas for years to come.

She keeps us going

Jia has been just wonderful this last week. She has been giving us lots of spontaneous hugs and kisses, and trying her best to be a comedienne.

After the funeral activities, we came home and Joe changed into some pajama pants. They were bright red with penguins on them. When she saw him, she got a slight smile on her face and said, "Oh Baba, CUTE!"

Jia also told her first joke. We were riding in a car and she asked, "Mama, what are you doing?" I said, "Sitting here. What are you doing?" She replied, "Playing in the sandbox. Kidding."

We were floored.

She really does keep us going.

So it continues...

We attended the candlelight vigil for Mark tonight. Everyone met at a park near his house and walked the route of his last bike ride en masse up to the point where he was killed. We videotaped the gathering for his wife because, understandably, she didn't feel up to it. We really didn't either, but wanted to go to show our support. Jia started fussing part way through, as it was close to bedtime. So we decided to leave a little early and proceed home.

Part way back we realized that we were walking alone in the same sketchy, poorly lit neighborhood where Mark was randomly attacked, dodging people who were beginning to fight. Then, we heard a big screech, and half a block behind us a car smashed into a minivan which then flew though a fence and into a tree. A terribly awful sight with injured children. We called 911 and were put on hold, repeatedly. Despite the fact that a fire station was two blocks away and cop cars even closer, it took nearly fifteen minutes for help to arrive.

I feel like our great city is falling apart.

But then part of me still has hope because nearly 700-800 people turned out against crime in support of Mark. And that was a beautiful thing.

Remembering

Mark's funeral was today. Joe had the honor of writing the obituary for it, and giving the eulogy. It was clear that Joe's remarks resonated with the many, many people there. Mark was truly something special, and that was evident with the outpouring of love and support today.

Joe also had the distinct privilege of lowering Mark's ashes into their resting place. I'm so very proud of him for all his efforts during this terribly hard time.

Mark and Joe and their friend Roger were inseparable for years. Roger also suffered an untimely death a couple of years ago and his resting place is in the same cemetery quite close to Mark's. How sadly convenient for Joe.

Mark had registered for the Minneapolis Bike Tour last Sunday. We rode the fifteen miles in his memory with two of his kids, some relatives and friends, and plan to do so every year.


Tomorrow night is a candlelight vigil in the neighborhood where Mark was attacked.

After that, we breathe, and begin to help his wife Samantha and the kids on a regular basis.

We appreciate all your comments here. Thanks.

News

For more information and video on our friend Mark, click here.

More sad times

I like to keep this blog a happy one as we all need to be cheered up now and then, but it seems false to be airy and light when we're intensely sad.

Joe's best friend, Mark, was just killed. He went for a bike ride last night and didn't come home. Someone found him at 7 a.m. in a yard this morning, still alive, far from his bike with serious trauma. He didn't make it for the paramedics to arrive. Police are calling it a homicide. It was so cold here last night, nearly hitting freezing, it just makes me sick. Mark has a wife and four kids. They are really hurting right now, as is Joe. He was a loving dad, a kind husband and a deeply caring friend. He didn't deserve this.

We also just found out that the mom of two kids in our wonderful neighbor family has rapidly advancing terminal cancer.

And a family friend slipped into a coma today.

It's about all we can take. With Joe losing his mother and brother and another friend within the year, and a very close friend last year, all without any warnings or time to say good-bye, I feel like we've had our quota.

Murder has had a close impact on my life before - the man I was with for about five years, prior to Joe, was killed during a burglary of his house. As a result, I'm getting really angry, and scared. I don't feel like we should be in constant fear, but at the same time I feel like building a fortress right now around everyone I love. We don't need any more reminders of the fragility of life. We've had enough, thank you.

So today, we are sad. We are sad for these families and I am sad for Joe. Please keep them in your thoughts and hug those dear to you.

What's for dinner?

I normally try to keep this blog focused on kid-related stuff, but I had to share a photo of this really great dinner Joe grilled up for us tonight.



Mmmmm, fiber. Notice the handy sand shovels? They're currently the hippest grill tool around.

So a squirrel apparently made a nest in our grill. It appears as though we haven't used the grill for a year, but in reality it was probably a week. Industrious little bugger.

High Style

Sometimes a girl just has to go for the glamour.

The best part about this photo is that Jia just finished taking a mud bath. That is, she sat in a pile of dirt and rubbed it all over her face, arms and legs. That's my girl - a complicated individual full of contradictions. Oh, the men she'll confound someday...

More Two Antics

In true two-year-old fashion, Jia woke us up five times the other night because she was loudly shouting, "MINE!"

I thought, what is she protecting at this hour, and more importantly, from whom?

Intended purpose?

We were playing with Mr. Potato Head and I asked Jia where to put the tongue. She knew exactly what to do with it.

Tagged again.

So I've been tagged again. I'm supposed to share my middle name and provide a fact or quality relevant to my life for each letter.

I won't be tagging anyone else, but I will respond to sweet Melanie's request (she spiffed up Jia's photos in this post).

My middle name is Erin. I was named after Jane Eyre, hence Jane Erin. In fact, I was initially called Jane Erin, you know, like Mary Katherine, but it didn't stick.

E - Effective. I take pride in fixing problems. I don't always do it in the most usual way, thus Joe has coined for me the following phrase: unconventional yet effective. I'm not nearly as clever as MacGyver but I have great appreciation for his efforts.

R - Roams. I have been having trouble staying put since getting Jia. I have, however, found that lack of sleep dampens wanderlust dramatically. Plus after our last trip I vowed that we're not flying as a family again anytime soon...

I - Inventive. I'm big on using what you have around you, and creating things to suit yourself. Kitchen example: I'm pretty good at slapdash cooking, making for some creative meals. Home decor example: I couldn't find the clock I wanted so I made one out of a decorative tin tile, some Mexican beads and a clock kit (which I doctored up even further, of course).

N - Nice. I'm from Minnesota. Enough said.

Legwarmers

Anyone who knows me, knows that I'm not a shopper. When I saw these legwarmers, however, I knew they were perfect for Jia. She absolutely loves them. I love them because they make diaper changes easier. Thanks to baby Zoe for the tip.


Yes, it was actually cool enough here for legwarmers one morning.

Toddler Tactics

Jia has added a new technique to her repertoire. Major repetition. The other day in the car we were talking about sharing, and she said, "I have Baby Joe!" on and on. I started counting and she said it, in fact, forty-four times. At first, I responded and said, "Yes, you are holding Baby Joe." And then, "yep, that's your baby." Then just "Yes" and then nothing. Then I attempted to change the subject or otherwise distract her. Didn't work. Words that come to mind are "single-minded" and "stubborn." I felt like saying, "push the stop button - she's stuck!"

We were eating dinner the other night and she politely said "More tofu please mama" repeatedly. At her first request I got up for more and she just kept repeating it until I had finished the task. I think she said it about thirty times. It's hard because I don't feel that this is time-out worthy, especially as she's saying please, and as she wanted more tofu of all things. One of my parenting books calls this badgering. Whatever it is, it drives me nuts. Has anyone experienced this? What do you do?